IELTS Writing Correction Service /
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Band 5

As well as making money, business have social responsibilities. Do you agree or disagree?

#money #business #responsibilities
Business
 can play a vital role in modern
society
. Apart from the high profit, I agree that
business
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businesses
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undertake
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undertakes
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 a heavy social responsibility.
Business
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The business
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 provides working opportunities for unemployed
people
 with wisdom and creativity. It can partly solve the problem of
high
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the high
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 unemployment rate in
a
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apply
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society
. Meanwhile,
business
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the business
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 provides a chance for
people
 from less well-off
background
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backgrounds
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 to get rid of poverty.
Business
 requires
less
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fewer
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 restrictions
of
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on
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 education degree and family support, as long as
people
 have amazing ideas and the character of hard-working.
From
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In
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 the long run,
Business
 is helpful to close the wealth divide between the rich and the poor in a
society
.
Business
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Businesses
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 can supply household products to
people
 who live in rural and remote
areas
, which means
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the business
a business
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business
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businesses
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 can help
people
 from
poor
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a poor
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family
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families
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 to improve their living conditions.
For example
, some
areas
 are lack
of
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apply
show examples
foods
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food
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 or water because of
the
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apply
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extreme weather condition and poor farming technology. At that time,
people
 could buy products transported from other
areas
 to meet their basic
need
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needs
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.
Business
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Businesses
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 strengthen the economic tie between different
areas
 and promote the economic development of the whole
society
.
Business
 is responsible
to
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for
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 the environment. Most
of
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apply
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business
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the business
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 activities rely on
the
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apply
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transportation.
However
, the emissions of vehicles and planes which contain carbon dioxide are harmful to the air. It may
also
 cause
the
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apply
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global warming and many other environmental problems.
Similarly
, the process of producing production can
also
 generate poisonous gas and substance. More environment-friendly methods of transportation and manufacture should be taken.
Moreover
, there are more green products have been produced
such
 as recycled
bottle
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bottles
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 and
clean energy
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clean-energy
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 cars to protect the environment. In conclusion, I agree that with exception of making money,
business
 is responsible
to
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for
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the
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apply
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society
.
Business
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Businesses
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 devote to reducing the unemployment rate, providing financial support to rural
areas
 and protecting the environment.
Submitted by 1404654525 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • social responsibilities
  • contribute
  • well-being
  • community
  • philanthropy
  • sustainability
  • ethical
  • trust
  • reputation
  • accountable
  • profit-making
  • balance
What to do next:
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