IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

Some people think that managers alone should make decisions in the company, while others think that employees should be involved in the decision-making process too. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #managers #decisions #company #employees #process
It is assumed that
company's
Correct article usage
the company's
show examples
 manager should decide for the issues lonely,
although
 others believe that staff should be involved. I will discuss
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
two sides in
further
 paragraphs.
To begin
 with, in
Add a hyphen
small-scaled
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small
Add an article
the small
a small
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 scaled
company
 it is acceptable to be handled by
only
Add an article
the only
show examples
 dean of the
company
; since one-person managing leads to fast
dicisions
Correct your spelling
decisions
 and mind mapping in order to achieve to
company
's goals and
Correct your spelling
therefore
show examples
therefor
Correct your spelling
therefore
show examples
,
this
 development
overally
Correct your spelling
overall
 will
be take
Change the verb form
take
show examples
 place in
company
's benefits and values in a short period.
On the other hand
 , by
sololy
Correct your spelling
solely
 managing in
company
Add an article
the company
a company
show examples
 especially the short scaled one, one
mistakes
Change to a singular noun
mistake
show examples
 will destroy all the staff's attempts and
hard working
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hard-working
show examples
;
for instance
, if the
company
 be in an economical hardship when a group of people think about it carefully,
finally
 the chances of
adressing
Correct your spelling
addressing
this
 issue will be increased.
Moreover
, people are socially connected to each other and they can get promotion in difficult situations by
help
Add an article
the help
show examples
 of each other and team working
specially
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especially
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 in working places is not the
excepetion
Correct your spelling
exception
. To sum up, I consider that one person cannot develop and direct the whole
company
 lonely, they managers should
benefits
Change the verb form
benefit
show examples
 from consultations of staffs.
Submitted by sp1371 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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