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Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

People work because they need money to live. What are some other reasons that people work? Discuss one or more of these reasons. Use specific examples and details to support your answer.

#people #work #money #support
On the one hand, there are individuals who involve themselves in different jobs to earn money to lead a comfortable life.
On the other hand
, there are some who either do household chores or work for a good cause, namely charity and fundraising. The majority of people prefer working outside to get a salary to fulfil their needs.
However
, there are many who willingly choose to work tirelessly to take care of their homes and family members.
For instance
, housewives and grandparents like to stay at home and look after the well-being of their house and children, without getting paid for it. Being a caretaker in the family, the motive behind these endless responsibilities
such
 as cooking, cleaning and grocery shopping, is the immense love and devotion towards their kids and spouse.
For example
, many wives in India work as homemakers and enjoy doing it. There are others who take part in various professions for the betterment of society not to get any income but for the sake of humanity. Social activists, fundraisers and public servants are a few examples of profiles who indulge themselves in activities and tasks to uplift the marginals or elders.
For instance
, there are numerous non-profit government organisations, old-age homes and public welfare groups which are funded by wealthy businessmen and governing authorities of the nation who appoint employees who believe in doing community service with superior moral and social values.
To sum up
,
although
 humans usually get employed by companies to earn wages.
However
, some would rather serve their best at home or in the community as welfare workers not to get pay cheques, but to attain self-fulfilment.
Submitted by gupta.swati2102 on

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task response
In writing task 2, it is essential to present a clear position or argument. Ensure that your ideas are clearly presented and directly address the task.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has good coherence and cohesion overall. However, ensure that you use a wider range of cohesive devices to link your ideas, such as transition words and synonyms.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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