Some people think that the increase in international travel has a negative impact on the environment and should be restricted. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #travel #impact #environment

In spite of the fact that the world now increasingly developing, there are some public consider the rise in international excursion has a detrimental effect on the environment and should be restrained. As

this

opinion might be opposite to mine, I am going to elaborate on some ideas regarding international transit. Searching for new skills and adventures is the first reason why we travel out of the country. Learning from only one source could make you limited in knowledge, being a lack of experience can be another result of that. Visiting new places all over the world can teach us more than we can get in our

home

towns,

in addition

to that, there are beneficial outcomes of travelling abroad, by discovering new cultures and getting to know new

people

from different backgrounds our minds will be illuminated.

Thus

, when we go back to our

home

country we can help enhancement process. In my point of view, international flying has no bad effects on the community where we live. To put that

in other words

, it is we who make

this

detrimental effect

according to

what kind of things we acquire from foreign places and

then

bringing these things into our environment.

For instance

, a student went overseas for a Master's degree, and after his return

home

he decided to use his knowledge to help his fellow citizens,

this

can be a good example of the fact that

this

trip was helpful and beneficial to the population in his country. To sum it up, making obstacles against international flying is not the right thing to do in case

Change preposition

apply

show examples

that

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

some folk are afraid that their culture and traditions could be affected. It is

people

who are travelling out there who should

make

Verb problem

have

show examples

self-control on what they are going to learn from their adventures,

people

who can not handle themselves when it comes to what they should bring

home

with him is to blame, the

responsible

Replace the word

responsibility

show examples

for any negative impacts is

people

themselves, not the trip.

Submitted by Ayoubkhalaileh on Thu Feb 02 2023

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Organize ideas in a more coherent and cohesive manner, with a clear introduction and conclusion that reflect the content of the essay. Use connecting words and phrases to link ideas.

lexical resource

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grammatical range

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Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
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Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

336 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that the increase in international travel has a negative impact on the environment and should be restricted. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Fully explain your ideas

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Most employees nowdays put increasing emphasis on social skills . Some people believe that social skills are important in addition to good qualifications for job success. To what extent do you agree or disagree.