The charts below show the proportion of expenditure by students, on average, at one university, in 2000 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features. Make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the proportion of expenditure by students, on average, at one university, in 2000 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features. Make comparisons where relevant.
The pie charts show how the students at one university spent their savings in 2010 compared to 2000, giving the percentages spent on average in seven different areas. By far, the most significant outlay by the students in both years was on Food and drink consumed at home, which accounted for 29% of
overall
expenditure
in both 2010 and 2000.
Also
Add a comma
Also,
show examples
the
expenditure
on Sports and
cultural
Replace the word
culture
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and on Holidays remained unaltered in
terms
of
percentage
. The most noticeable feature was the drop in the proportion of money spent on Clothing, which experienced a significant decline falling from 16% in 2000 to 5% in 2010.
On the other hand
, students’
expenditure
on Transport and Eating out saw a slight growth, to 9% and 8% respectively. In
parti- cular
Correct your spelling
particular
show examples
, the latter was noteworthy because, though it started from the lowest base (4%), it outstripped spending on both Holidays and Clothing in 2010.
Finally
, the Utilities area
also
grew in
terms
of
percentage
, jumping from 21% in 2000 to 27% in 2010. By far, the most noticeable feature is the dramatic drop in the proportion of
expenditure
on Clothing. It experienced a significant decline, with a fall from 16% in 2000 to 5% in 2010, a drop of approximately one-third of the initial value in
terms
of
percentage
.
By contrast
, spending on Eating Out rose from 4% in 2000 to 8% in 2010, exactly twofold the initial value in
percentage
terms
.
Also
Add a comma
Also,
show examples
the outlay by students on Utilities (electricity/water) increased sharply from 21% to 27%. Expenses on Sports and
cultural
Replace the word
culture
show examples
, Holidays and Food and drink (home) hold steady across the decade.
Submitted by galtarossaluca00 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 88%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words expenditure, terms, percentage with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 5 times.
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "drop" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "fall" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 3 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Proportion of expenditure
  • Revenue
  • Categories
  • Significant changes
  • Spending habits
  • Relatively stable
  • Inflation
  • Lifestyle
  • Investments
  • Academic materials
  • Entertainment
  • Accommodation
  • Utilities
  • Food
  • Transportation
  • Miscellaneous expenses
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