IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

The chart below shows the places visited by different people living in Australia. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the places visited by different people living in Australia. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#places #people #australia #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The bar chart illustrates four
places
 visited by
people
 who live in
Australia
, namely
zoo
Correct article usage
the zoo
show examples
, library,
theatre
, and
cinema
. In detail, it presents the proportion of three kinds of
people
 coming to each
places
Change to a singular noun
place
show examples
 including
born
Correct pronoun usage
those born
show examples
 in
Australia
, new
migrants
 born in
English-Speaking
Correct your spelling
English-speaking
show examples
countries
, and new
migrants
 born in other
countries
.
Overall
, the proportion of
Australia
's residents coming to
Cinema
 is the highest among the four
places
 with more than 50%,
orderly
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
followed by the figure of
people
 who come to
library
Correct article usage
the library
show examples
, zoo, and
theatre
. The figure
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
people
 visiting
theatre
Correct article usage
the theatre
show examples
 is the lowest at about 15%. In each
groups
Change to a singular noun
group
show examples
 of
people
, there is
also
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 immense difference.
People
 who are born in
Australia
 and new
migrants
 born in English-speaking
countries
 prefer visiting
cinema
 to other
places
, especially
theatre
. Meanwhile, new
migrants
 born in other
countries
 tend to
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
visit both
library
Fix the agreement mistake
libraries
show examples
 and
cinema
Fix the agreement mistake
cinemas
show examples
.
Submitted by viethoangnguyen0611 on

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words places, people, australia, theatre, cinema, migrants, countries with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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