Home schooling belongs to the past and is unacceptable in modern society. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Use your own knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence

Everything has two sides and
home schooling
Correct your spelling
homeschooling
show examples
is not an exception. In the
past
Add a comma
past,
show examples
it seemed like the most natural way of educating children, but today many people criticize it. We must acknowledge that
parents
know their children best. That gives them a good chance of knowing how to make their
child
understand certain concepts. Using their
child
's interests,
parents
can make the process of learning more enjoyable and effective.
In addition
, being at
home
makes a
child
feel safe, which contributes to his ability to concentrate on studying.
Nevertheless
, many people believe that teaching should be done by professionals. There are many proven scientific approaches that produce good results and without those techniques,
parents
who teach their kids at
home
have no chance of success. Associative learning is a good example of
such
a technique. Showing the
child
images
while
learning the alphabet (apple for "a", boy for "b") makes him or
her
Change the pronoun
she
show examples
remember the letters faster and easier.
In addition
, not every parent is capable of teaching his or her
child
at
home
because the blind cannot lead the blind.
Parents
cannot teach children something they don't know themselves, and let's face it - not all of us have a profound knowledge of history or geography even on a school textbook level. Eventually, even those mums and dads who succeeded at school could forget material with the passage of time. In conclusion, I have more trust in the abilities and experience of professional teachers than I do in my own.
Submitted by dasha.20032854 on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with a well-defined introduction and conclusion, which is excellent for readability. However, to improve coherence, ensure smoother transitions between paragraphs and points. Using linking words like 'furthermore,' 'moreover,' or 'however' can help make your argument flow more naturally.
task achievement
You've made a commendable effort in discussing both sides of the argument. To enhance task achievement, focus more on developing your arguments with specific examples and evidence. While you've mentioned techniques like associative learning, delving deeper into how these methods are applied in professional settings compared to home schooling would strengthen your point.
task achievement
For a more comprehensive approach to the task, consider introducing more varied examples from different contexts, or including data or studies that support your argument. Additionally, establishing a more explicit personal stance throughout could make your essay more persuasive.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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