You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. You are due to start a new job next week but you will not be able to because you have some problems. Write a letter to your new employer. In your letter • explain your situation • describe your problems • tell him/her when you think you can start. You should write at least 150 words. You do NOT need to write your own address.

#minutes #job #week #employer #situation #address

Dear John Smith, I am writing

this

letter to request you to extend my joining date which is a week later 23rd of March because I am leaving Canada

due to

some emergency occurring at my home back India. I already booked a flight for the 20th of March. The reason behind

this

is my grandmother was admitted to the hospital. She is 85 years old and she is suffering from a heart attack. Doctors already mentioned that her life is at risk.

Similarly

, I am only her grandson and we have been separated since September 2021. She has an urge to meet me in her critical condition which is a situation I can not avoid. I am planning to stay two weeks in India. My return ticket is on 31st of March.

Therefore

, I am able to join the company on the 1st of April. I look forward to hearing from you. Yours faithfully, Harpreet Kaur.

Submitted by harpreet291kaur on Thu Mar 14 2024

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Task Completion

In terms of task response, make sure you clearly address all parts of the task. While you've explained the situation and described your problems, you could further clarify your intentions by expressing regret for the inconvenience and reiterating your enthusiasm for starting the new role. This strengthens the completeness of your response.

Coherence and Cohesion

For coherence and cohesion, structuring your letter into clear paragraphs for each point you make is essential. You've done well, but consider starting a new paragraph for introducing your grandmother's situation and another for stating when you can start. Using a range of linking words (e.g., Furthermore, In addition, Therefore) could also enhance your letter's flow.

Formality

Finally, while you've used a polite and formal tone suitable for a new employer, maintaining consistency in formality throughout the letter is key. Avoid overly casual phrases or abbreviations that might undermine the professional tone of your letter.

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

157 words

8.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

unforeseen circumstances
apologies
commencement date
postpone
urgent matters
documentation
commitment
flexibility
adjustments
reassurance
eager to contribute
rectify the situation
feasible start date
collaboration
understanding
mitigate

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The charts detail the proportion of Australian secondary school graduates who were unemployed, employed or further education in 1980, 1990, and 2000.

Today, most people get married and give birth in their thirties rather than when they are younger. Is it a positive or negative development in your opinion? To what extent do you support this development?

he increase in mobile phone use in recent years has transformed the way we live, communicate, and do business. Mobile phones can also be the cause of social or medical problems. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages of mobile phones?

Task 1 You have lost an item of value on a train. Write a letter to the railway company. In your letter describe the item explain where and when you left it say what action you would like the company to take Write at least 150 words.