In many cities, an increasing number of people do not know their neighbors and there is a lack of a sense of community. What are the causes of this problem? How can it be solved?

These days, indifference about their
neighbours
in the city centre is one of the critical issues all over the world. To improve our socialise, we have to solve
this
problem together.
This
essay will attempt to identify problems and propose some applicable solutions to redress
this
matter. Broadly speaking, there are some main problems with
this
issue.
Firstly
, the main cause of
this
issue is that we are living digital era. We always watch our smartphone whenever we walk so we can not notify our
neighbours
.
Secondly
, compared to the past, we have more wariness about our
neighbours
. Because, sometimes we can face murder accidents
between
Change preposition
among
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our
neighbours
due to
minor problems
such
as floor noise, and smoking smell. In terms of proposing some solution to
this
apparent dilemma, the members of society and government should cooperate together to tackle
this
problem.
Firstly
, the government make diverse policies to encourage
people
's socialise.
For instance
, they make various clubs
such
as sports, hiking, and walking pets.
As a result
,
people
can form a close rapport as having the same interests. A
further
alternative to solve
this
problem is that
people
make a welcoming culture. In Korea, most
people
do not greet their
neighbours
whenever meeting at cafes, streets, or even lifts. So we have to motivate American small talk culture. In conclusion, most
people
occasionally ignore their regional
neighbours
.
Also
when
this
behaviour is sustained,
this
becomes more serious.
However
, if we practice diverse ways could be sensibly and easily tackled.
Submitted by wowoo04066 on

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Task Achievement
Increase the clarity and comprehensiveness of your ideas by developing each point more thoroughly. Provide more detailed explanations for why the problem exists and how the solutions can be implemented effectively. These explanations should be supported by specific examples or data when possible, to make your arguments more convincing.
Coherence and Cohesion
Organize your essay more logically by ensuring there is a clear flow of ideas from one paragraph to the next. Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, linking phrases, and topic sentences at the beginning of paragraphs to guide the reader through your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on making your main points more clearly supported by relevant details and examples. Each problem and solution you discuss should be accompanied by specific information or scenarios that illustrate the issue or the effectiveness of the solution you propose.
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