IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

The diagrams below shew the life cycle of the silkworm and the stages in the production of silk cloth. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons were relevant.

#diagrams #shew #life #cycle #silkworm #stages #production #silk #cloth #information #features #comparisons
The pictures demonstrate the different stages of life that silkworms go through from birth to adulthood and the processes of making silk cloth from their cocoons.
Overall
, there are four steps for them to become fully grown-ups and five steps for the cloth to be produced. Starting with the life cycle of the silkworm, the adult silkworm first lays eggs on a leaf. In 10 days, the eggs hatch and larvae come out to consume a mulberry leaf for food.
Subsequently
, it takes from 4 to 6 weeks for the larvas to produce silk threads and another 3 to 8 days to complete their cocoons. After spending 16 days in them, the larva
finally
 becomes a moth and a new life cycle begins again. Turning to manufacturing the silk cloth, the first stage begins by selecting a cocoon, which is later placed in a bowl for boiling.
Then
, the boiled cocoon is unwinded with a thread stretching from 300 to 900 meters. The thread is twisted with another string and soaked in coloured water for dyeing. The process ends with weaving and dyeing a second time.
Submitted by mizuho on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure each paragraph focuses on a clear aspect of the prompt. For example, separate the discussion of the silkworm's life cycle from the silk cloth production process for clarity.
Coherence & Cohesion
Integrate a wider variety of linking words to improve the flow between ideas and sentences.
Task Achievement
To enhance task achievement, consider adding more detailed comparisons between the stages of the silkworm life cycle and silk cloth production whenever relevant. This will provide a more comprehensive analysis.
Task Achievement
Incorporate an introductory sentence that presents the main topic more succinctly and a concluding sentence that summarizes the key findings or implications of your description.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: