18.Some people say that all young people should be required to stay in full-time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #education #years

Some of the individuals have to think about their children's basic training activity. Some of the strengths are ideas about kids having to study until they become adults.

Also

this

schooling has to be taken all day. In

this

article, I will talk about my opinion. And

finally

, I will say ' Do I accept

this

thought or not?'.

Firstly

, schooling is the most important thing for our youngest generations. School can teach us everything about our world. Actually, training begins within the family

then

it continues with teachers in the academy. It is necessary to be a human. Because folks live with each other, and

also

they learn a lot of things from others. Humanity, with their born, who are open to learning. At our youngest ages is pretty much easy to ascertain something. So that's why we have to spend our time as a valuable.

Due to

this

thought some societies decided that anyone under the age of 18 needed to go to primary, secondary and high school.

Secondly

on the other hand

, these places can give us a standard teaching. It means, teaches pattern skills.

However

, everyone is different. All kids have dissimilar lifestyles, aptitudes and

also

even the things he enjoys in his soul are several. Because of

this

not everyone can follow the same path. In conclusion, the issue, which is very important for the future of families, needs to be considered by taking into account the differences between individuals. In my opinion, I do not support

this

stereotypical thinking. Because the heart already shows kids the way should follow.

Submitted by ecem.tekben on Sun Mar 24 2024

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coherence cohesion

Focus on structuring your essay more logically. A clearer distinction between paragraphs and a logical flow from the introduction, through the main body, to the conclusion can help make your argument more persuasive.

coherence cohesion

Use topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to introduce the main idea. This will help your reader follow your argument more easily.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

265 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.5

4.5

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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18.Some people say that all young people should be required to stay in full-time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Many people believe that the government should provide free education for all children. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Nowadays people are spending more time away their homes because they spend longer in their work place. Discuss advantage and disadvantage

More and more plastic waste has polluted cities, the countryside and oceans. What problems does it cause and what measures can be taken?

Some people argue that job satisfaction is more important than job security, while others believe that they cannot always expect job satisfaction, and a permanent job is more important. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.