Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and dtermination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Dicuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #success #life #work #dtermination #factors #money #appearance #dicuss

In today's competitive landscape, the pursuit of

wealth

and physical attractiveness has gained increasing prominence.

While

some argue that

success

is primarily tied to one's financial status and appearance, others contend that unwavering determination is the cornerstone of achieving genuine power.

This

essay will delve into both viewpoints by examining a range of examples. On one side of the spectrum, the emphasis on external beauty and

wealth

has grown in significance in the digital era. Many

individuals

prioritize lucrative careers in sectors

such

as fashion or

modeling

Change the spelling

modelling

show examples

, leveraging their attractive looks to secure well-paid positions.

Similarly

, those who amass substantial

wealth

often equate financial prosperity with personal

fulfillment

Change the spelling

fulfilment

show examples

and societal esteem. It is not uncommon to see affluent

individuals

flaunting their material possessions as symbols of

success

Conversely

, the significance of hard work and ambition in attaining

success

should not be underestimated.

Individuals

who wholeheartedly commit themselves to their education or professions with perseverance and dedication are more likely to realize their objectives.

For example

, students invest considerable effort in their studies before embarking on their careers, showcasing their dedication to future pursuits.

Furthermore

, many accomplished entrepreneurs attribute their achievements to unwavering determination and resilience in pursuing their passions, even in the face of adversity. In conclusion,

while

the allure of

wealth

and physical attractiveness may be appealing in contemporary society, it is ultimately one's determination and diligence that pave the path to genuine

success

. Irrespective of external factors,

individuals

who demonstrate steadfast commitment and perseverance are more likely to actualize their aspirations and experience enduring

fulfillment

Change the spelling

fulfilment

show examples

Wed Mar 27 2024

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Logical Structure

Ensure a clear and concise introduction that outlines the essay's structure, helping readers understand the flow of arguments.

Coherence & Cohesion

Use linking words effectively to ensure coherency between paragraphs and within sentences.

Supported Main Points

Incorporate more concrete examples to support your main points, enhancing the persuasiveness of your essay.

Complete Response

Focus on fully answering the question by covering all aspects of the task, including providing a balanced discussion of both views and your own opinion.

Clear & Comprehensive Ideas

Strive for clarity in presenting your ideas by organizing them in a logical and accessible manner.

Relevant & Specific Examples

Incorporate real-world examples or data to provide evidence for your arguments, making them more relevant and convincing.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

257 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and dtermination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Dicuss both views and give your opinion.

Your opinion

Plastic bags, plastic bottles and plastic packaging are bad for the environment. What damage does plastic do to the environment ? What can be done by governments and individuals to solve this problem ?

Nowadays the differences between countries are becoming less evident because we see the same TV shows, advertisements, fashion and follow the same brands. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

In many parts of the world, people search for family history. some people think that finding for the previous generations is a thing to do, but others think that it is better to be focus on present and future generations. Discuss both views and give your opinion.