Some people argue that technological inventions, such as mobile phones, are making people socially less interactive. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #inventions #phones

Nowadays, there has commonly been a huge amount of debate regarding technological

inventions

. The general view, when it comes to

this

subject matter has been a fascinating response,

as well as

having contradictory opinions. Technological

inventions

have split public opinion, with various means being examined and dissected. The main purpose of

this

essay is to discuss both sides of the argument and analyze them in detail. Some people believe that technological

inventions

create a breeding ground for ill education and knowledge,

hence

leading to more serious edification problems

such

as lack of awareness.

For example

, my sister usually uses PlayStation from Sony company because it makes a lot of video games.

In addition

this

, physical and mental health problems are major concerns, and there has been indisputable scientific evidence clearly indicating a link between bad health and technological

inventions

For instance

, my brother is a driver, and he does have airpods to call his customers, so he always has ear pain from using airpods. Another serious consequence would be the effect

this

issue has on time and finances. On the whole, technological

inventions

certainly have an influential effect when it comes to time and money concerns.

However

, others feel that technological

inventions

are certainly influencing the capabilities of education in general, as they enrich people's knowledge and give them the freedom to take action in favour of their community.

Moreover

, technological

inventions

have a lot of good sides as they are good not only for individuals and families but

also

for the whole society. The

last

point is that technological

inventions

have a lot of advantages, as they play a crucial role in improving many sectors in the state or country.

Also

, they push the stability of the whole world forward. In general, when it comes to

this

theme, I do believe that different individuals would suggest a wide range of proposals discussing what needs to be done.

Nevertheless

, it is rather evident that there are certain ways to go about improving and resolving the issues linked to technological

inventions

. In conclusion, when it comes to

this

theme, different individuals would suggest a wide range of proposals discussing what needs to be done.

Nevertheless

, it is rather evident that there are certain ways to go about improving and resolving the issues linked to technological

inventions

Overall

, it is very clear that, depending on the level of influence and power someone has, it is the responsibility of the governments and civilians alike to help improve the matters at hand.

Submitted by waell12 on Sun Mar 31 2024

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task achievement

Ensure that your essay directly addresses the question asked. It appears that you've discussed both positive and negative aspects of technological inventions, but the focus should be more sharply on how these inventions affect social interaction.

coherence cohesion

Use clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to guide the reader through your argument more effectively. This will help in improving the logical structure of your essay.

task achievement

Be mindful of the relevance of examples. While personal examples are engaging, ensure they clearly support the main argument of the paragraph: in this case, how technology affects social interaction.

coherence cohesion

Repeat key phrases or ideas to tie your paragraphs together, enhancing the cohesion of your essay. This also helps in reinforcing your stance on the topic.

task achievement

Use of personal examples to support arguments makes your essay engaging and relatable.

coherence cohesion

Your conclusion effectively summarises the essay and reiterates your position, showing a good understanding of essay structure.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

418 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people argue that technological inventions, such as mobile phones, are making people socially less interactive. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

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