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Writing Samples /
Band 6

Many people believe working from home is better than going to an office. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #home #office
Many people prefer working from their house or apartment
instead
 of an
office
 . I totally agree that it is better to
workk
Correct your spelling
work
 from
home
 because it
save
Change the verb form
saves
show examples
time
 and
increase
Change the verb form
increases
show examples
 productivity. The main reason, I support working from is that it
lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
show examples
 to saving
time
 .
In particular
 , it
eliminate
Change the verb form
eliminates
show examples
 the need for a daily commute to an
office
 , which saves most people many hours per week.
For example
 ,
due to
 covid lockdowns , I am now working
frome
Correct your spelling
from
home
 and
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 save at least ten hours each week that would
otherwise
br
Correct your spelling
be
 spent travelling . I
also
 save
time
 on dressing and grooming myself for work as I can dress more casually when
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 work
frome
Correct your spelling
from
home
 unlike when I go to an
office
 and need to put on a suit and tie.
Furthermore
 , working
frome
Correct your spelling
from
 one 's residence can
also
 lead to higher productivity.
This
 is because it
eliminate
Change the verb form
eliminates
show examples
 the distractions that come with working
an
Correct your spelling
in
show examples
 an
office
 environment like noise . and colleagues
interruping
Correct your spelling
interrupting
.
For instance
 , since
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 started working from
home
 , I no longer get distracted by my
co workers
Add a hyphen
co-workers
show examples
 chatting or
stoping
Correct your spelling
stopping
show examples
 by my desk to ask me unnecessary questions and
this
 enables me to not only get more done but
also
 have higher quality outcomes on my projects. In conclusion , I completely
beleive
Correct your spelling
believe
 that working from
home
 is better.
This
 is because it saves
time
 travelling to from an
office
 and
lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
show examples
 to higher levels of efficiency.
Therefore
, employers should try to offer their workers
this
 option whenever possible.
Submitted by viewsoysoongnern on

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Language Accuracy
Watch out for typographical errors and consistently check for correct spelling of words (e.g., 'working from home' instead of 'working frome home', 'stoping' should be 'stopping').
Grammar
Ensure plural and singular forms are used correctly (e.g., 'it leads' instead of 'it lead', 'eliminates' instead of 'eliminate').
Punctuation
Work on punctuating correctly and consistently, especially with commas and periods to improve readability.
Vocabulary
Try to vary your vocabulary more to avoid repetition of phrases (e.g., 'saves time' and 'eliminates distractions'). Consider synonyms and paraphrasing.
Structure
Successfully introduced and concluded the essay with strong statements supporting your viewpoint.
Content & Examples
Good use of specific examples to support main points, enhancing the argument's persuasiveness.
Task Response
Maintained a clear position throughout the essay, demonstrating an understanding of the topic.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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