Some people think that certain old buildings are more worth preserving than other ones. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, governments and many
people
attempt to uphold historical
buildings
in order to increase their income. Some
people
believe that protecting historic
buildings
is more valuable than preserving the newest ones. It seems to me that rebuilding ancient relics is a worthwhile act and I will explain why in
this
essay.
Firstly
, the renewal of old standing is a relevant solution to restore the chronicles and identity of the nations. It means that
people
could comprehend their ancestor achievements in
this
way and pride their identity extremely.
For example
, Persepolis located in Shiraz displays the power and glory of the Achaemenid empire capital, and Kurosh the first king of the Achaemenid dynasty established to rule is a well-known place in the world that Iranian
people
are proud of. A second factor is that historical structure could be a symbol of civilization and culture of the society that it can attach ancient generations to new ones.
Therefore
, memorable edifices could show life conditions in the past.
For instance
, the air pocket of structures in Yazd shows that
people
used to cool the air inside the houses by
this
method they adapt themselves to hot and dry weather.
This
leads us to the final and perhaps most significant element that protecting old
buildings
can have an intensive impact on countries' income by attracting tourists
This
means that if tourists visit these places, an economic boom will happen.
For instance
, Egypt can earn lots of money from its pyramids. Indeed, some claim that renovating historical constructions costs a lot and is not affordable. Despite
this
, it seems that the preservation of aged
buildings
is a valuable investment for the countries. In conclusion, it seems maintaining ancient structures can help economic growth, by recognizing chronicles, and cultural symbols.
Although
protest pretense restoration has a sheer cost correct management of reconstruction costs will be lower.
Submitted by TUTOO on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Structure
Your essay is well-structured, with clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Make sure each paragraph has a clear central idea.
Sentence Variety
Try to vary your sentence structures more to enhance readability and flow. Using a mix of simple, compound, and complex sentences can make your writing more engaging.
Transition
Pay attention to your essay's coherence by improving transitions between ideas and paragraphs. Using phrases like 'furthermore,' 'in addition,' 'moreover,' can help make your argument flow more smoothly.
Examples
You have selected strong, relevant examples to support your points. Continue to integrate such examples for a more persuasive argument.
Thesis Statement
You provided a strong thesis statement that set the direction of your essay effectively.
Use of Examples
Relevant and specific examples were used to support your arguments, making your essay more convincing.
Conclusion
Your conclusion effectively summarized the main points of your essay, providing a strong closure.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: