Your friend invited you to go with him/her to a concert next week, however, you are unable to come. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter •let your friend know why you can't go to the concert; •suggest another activity you can do together; •explain why you think your friend would enjoy this activity.

#friend #concert #week #•let #•suggest #activity #•explain

Dear Sam, I’m writing

this

letter to let you know that I can’t come with you to attend the upcoming

event

. I hope

this

letter finds you well. I’m so sorry to say that I cannot attend the upcoming concert with you because one of my professors seeking my help with his final thesis. I know you will feel bad, but

this

is my situation.

In addition

, if I help my teacher with his research paper. Definitely, he will help with my projects

also

Hence

, it will help to improve my career standards.

Furthermore

, I do have good news for you. Recently, I purchased tickets for the next year's Apple's WWDC

event

Moreover

, I booked the seats, close to the main stage.

Hence

, we will get the opportunity to see the latest technology close to our eyes. Apart from that, the people who attend the

event

will receive the latest phone after the concert ends.

Finally

, I would like to share the cost of the next year’s

event

. Please kindly take a deep breath because it is completely free for us. I got these tickets from the Apple lottery system.

Therefore

, we don’t want to spend a single penny from our pockets. I hope you can understand my situation and look forward to hearing from you soon. All the best, Kumar

Submitted by jeeveshkb22 on Wed Apr 03 2024

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task achievement

Make sure to directly address each point of the task in a clear and concise manner. While you have addressed all points, ensuring clarity at the beginning can help in achieving a higher task achievement score.

coherence and cohesion

To improve coherence, consider using a wider variety of linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more smoothly. This will enhance the flow of your letter.

minor inaccuracies

Watch out for minor grammatical inaccuracies and sentence structure issues. Polishing these aspects can further improve the overall quality of your writing.

greeting and closing

Your letter nicely included a greeting and a closing, which is excellent for the overall structure.

single idea per paragraph

You succeeded in introducing each new idea in a separate paragraph, making your letter easy to follow.

suitable writing tone

Your tone is appropriately friendly and apologetic, fitting the context of writing to a friend.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

221 words

8.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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