You are studying a short course in another country. Your accommodation was arranged by the course provider. There is a major problem with the accommodation. Write a letter to the course provider. In your letter: Say what the problem is. Describe the accommodation you thought you were getting. Ask the provider to solve the problem.

#course #country #accommodation #provider

Dear Sir, I Lisa Akter, am a current student in the Marketing Management program for the Summar Course. Recently, I moved to Canada to take the three-month short course at your esteemed institution and my accommodation has been arranged by you.

Moreover

, I was supposed to get a room in the female dorm, unfortunately, you gave me a seat in the male dormant which was like a nightmare for me.

Hence

it is really inconvenient for me to share the kitchen and washroom with the boys.

Apart from

this

, my family is worried about my safety as I am redising with the male.

In addition

this

, I am feeling not only devastated but

also

unable to focus on my studies.

However

, I hope you can imagine my situation and come up with a solution promptly. I eagerly await your prompt response in

this

matter. I am enclosing my contact details for your reference. With regards, Lisa Akter

Submitted by Lisa Bhuiyan on Thu Apr 04 2024

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structure

To enhance the logical structure, consider organizing your thoughts more clearly. Group related information together and maintain a seamless flow from one idea to the next.

focus

For a higher single idea per paragraph rating, try to focus each paragraph on a specific aspect of your concern. This helps in maintaining clarity and ensuring each part of your issue is addressed thoroughly.

detail

Your letter successfully addresses all key aspects required by the task, which is commendable. However, adding more specific details about what kind of accommodation you were expecting can further improve the completeness of your response.

tone

Maintaining a respectful and formal tone throughout the letter is appropriate for the context. Good job on choosing the right level of formality.

closing

The closing of the letter is polite and expectant of a prompt response, which is very appropriate in this scenario.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

158 words

8.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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