IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The pie charts below show the amount of electricity generated by energy source in Scotland for twenty years ago and last year.

The pie charts below show the amount of electricity generated by energy source in Scotland for twenty years ago and last year.
#show #amount #electricity #energy #source #scotland #twenty #years #year
The pie graphs depict the amount of produced
electricity
 by distinctive resources 20 years before and a year ago in Scotland.
Overall
, it is clear to note that coal contributed the most to the economy,
while
 oil and
hydro pumped
Add a hyphen
hydro-pumped
show examples
 storage
were
Change the verb form
was
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 the smallest
segment
Change the noun form
segments
show examples
 in both periods. Coal and gas made up the biggest part of the chart two decades before,
however
Add a comma
however,
show examples
 the difference between them is
hefty
Correct article usage
a hefty
show examples
 20%. The figures were 41.7 and 22.3 % respectively.
In contrast
, 1 year ago nuclear with over a quarter was the second
electricity generating
Add a hyphen
electricity-generating
show examples
 resource, with only
5
Correct article usage
a 5
show examples
% difference from coal. Gas was the third with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
almost the same amount of
electricity
 produced 20 years ago. Despite oil
was
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
 the least significant part of the economy in both graphs, it soared about 2 times, producing 4 % of
electricity
,
while
hydro pumped
Add a hyphen
hydro-pumped
show examples
 storage
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
experienced a decrease in
production
Add an article
the production
show examples
 of it.
Submitted by dnm.best on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words electricity with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "amount" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "graphs" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "difference" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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