You are interested in attending a training course abroad but require financial support to do so. Write a letter to the education department requesting financial assistance. In your letter introduce yourself describe the training course and how it would benefit your work explain why you need financial assistance.

Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing
this
letter to request
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
financial help to join a training
course
at your university which is going to happen in the next month.
while
introducing myself, my name is XYZ. I have done my Bachelor of Medical at Punjab University, Chandigarh.
In addition
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
, I have cleared many state and National level exams. Fortunately, I appeared in the
entry level
Add a hyphen
entry-level
show examples
exam which was conducted by your institution. Luckily, I cracked that examination
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and got selected for
training
Add an article
the training
a training
show examples
course
.
This
course
would be beneficial for
myself
Change the pronoun
me
show examples
to get
job
Add an article
a job
show examples
in one of the famous hospitals. Not only
this
, but
also
I could be eligible to pursue my Master's degree at your institution .
This
course
would be great for my career growth as a medical student.
To pursue
Fix the infinitive
Pursue
show examples
this
course
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
requires high expenses
inclding
Correct your spelling
including
institution
fee
Fix the agreement mistake
fees
show examples
,
living
Correct word choice
and living
show examples
and commuting expenses. At the time of registration I was not really sure
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
whether I
can
Wrong verb form
could
show examples
get a chance to do it. Unfortunately, I can not afford the
expenes
Correct your spelling
expenses
expense
and
fee
Fix the agreement mistake
fees
show examples
. I am requesting
scholarship
Correct article usage
a scholarship
show examples
or discount on my fee structure. I would be grateful to you. I am looking forward
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
your prompt and positive response. yours sincerely, XYZ
Submitted by sohimanwinder on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction
Your introduction is well-structured, providing clear information about yourself. For further improvement, streamline your introduction to directly address the request from the beginning.
Content coherence
The section describing the training course and its benefits is slightly less focused. Make sure each paragraph concentrates on a single idea for clearer communication.
Argument Development
Your explanation for needing financial assistance is clear, but providing specific examples or details could strengthen your argument.
Tone
Try to maintain a more formal tone throughout, avoiding casual expressions. This will enhance the professionalism of your request.
Conclusion
End your letter with a stronger conclusion summarizing your request and expressing anticipation for a response.
Introduction
You have effectively introduced yourself and explained your qualifications.
Content relevance
Your request for financial assistance and the justification for it are understandable.
Letter Structure
The structure of the letter, including greeting and closing, is appropriate and well-handled.

Structure your letter

A letter needs to be written using a proper format, including the following:

  • A greeting (Dear sir/madam, Dear John, Dear Mr. Smith)
  • The main body (consisting of paragraphs for each part of the letter)
  • A closing (Yours sincerely, Yours faithfully, Best wishes, Kind regards, Love)

When writing a letter as part of the IELTS General Training Writing Task 1, it is important to include the bullet points presented to you in the question.

All three bullet points need to be presented. And remember that some bullet points contain more than one element. So, make sure to watch for ‘and’ and plurals.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: